You Can't See Me: The lesson in Basic Thuganomics with instructor John Cena

On April 3rd, John Cena realized his dream by laying out champion John Bradshaw Layfield with his patented finisher the F-U and becoming the World Wrestling Entertainment Champion. His time... is now. Ever since 2003, John Cena has adapted a "hip-hop" gimmick for his character in the WWE (oddly enough, it was former ROH Champ Samoa Joe's idea). A lot of folks saw this as a joke, with obvious references to Vanilla Ice and Marky Mark (Cena IS a lot like Marky Mark I'll admit) and few took him seriously. Little did they know that Cena grew up as a hip-hop fan and had respect for the true principles of the hip-hop culture. No sir, Cena could indeed rap, and often did on WWE's Smackdown television broadcast. Cena quickly made friends with such well-known rap acts as Method Man, 7L, Esoteric, Murs, and Bumpy Knuckles.

A lot of folks wondered when Cena would drop an album, and he smartly waited until he was on top of the WWE mountain before releasing You Can't See Me, an title derived from his infamous catch-phrase. I'm 100% sure that much like Chris Jericho's Fozzy, this album will probably be greeted with a lot of angst from idiot fans who point the finger and say "they're wrestlers, not artists", but let's nevermind the nobodies: You Can't See Me is hot, and much better than I had anticipated. Cena is joined by his cousin and fellow emcee Tha Trademarc on the record who's also very ill. Now it's time to see if it really is Cena's time, or if he's just a flash in the pan.


Track List & Ratings

1. My Time is Now (5 Stars)
2. Don't Fuck With Us (4 Stars)
3. Flow East f/ Bumpy Knuckles (4 Stars)
4. Right Now (5 Stars)
5. Make It Loud (2 Stars)
6. Just Another Day (5 Stars)
7. Summer Flings (5 Stars)
8. Keep Frontin f/ Bumpy Knuckles (3 Stars)
9. We Didn't Want You to Know (4 Stars)
10. Bad Bad Man (5 Stars)
11. Running Game (5 Stars)
12. Beantown f/ Esoteric (5 Stars)
13. This is How We Roll (5 Stars)
14. What Now (4 Stars)
15. Know the Rep f/ Bumpy Knuckles (4 Stars)
16. Chain Gang is the Click (3 Stars)
17. If It All Ended Tommorow (4 1/2 Stars)



When those horns blast and the crowd delivers a tremendous pop, you can't deny it when John Cena says "My Time is Now", which is Cena's current theme song in WWE. In one of the most infectious beats I've heard in a long time, a powerful orchestra of horns and bass engulfs the track, and Cena immediately hits us with a chorus that I can relate to personally ("Ya Time is Up, My Time is Now") and you can't help but pop ya head in joy. Cena's opening verse is flaming, showcasing not just his bragging ability, but the fact that the guy can spit a punchline or two "Ain't no way you breakin me kid, I'm harder than nails // Plus I keep it on lock, like I'm part of the jail // I'm slaughterin stale, competition, I got the whole block wishin // they could run with my division but they gone fishin // - with no bait, kid your boy hold weight // I got my soul straight, I brush your mouth like Colgate". Besides just the hard lyrics and strong flow, Cena's voice is oozing charisma from top to bottom. However, while Cena is one dope emcee, Tha Trademarc completely steals the show from the WWE Champion. (P.S. Did anybody else notice the exact same rumble scream from M.O.P.'s "Ante Up").

"See what happens when the ice age melt
You see monetary status is not what matters, but it helps
I rock a timepiece by Benny if any
The same reason y'all could love me is the same reason y'all condemn me
A man's measured by the way that he thinks
Not clothing lines, ice links, leather and minks
I spent 20 plus years seekin knowledge of self
So for now Marc Predka's livin live for wealth"

The following track "Don't Fuck With Us" is hot. A nice little assortment of synthesizers, horns, and bumping bass provide an energetic piece for Cena to brag over. The majority of the album finds Cena bragging about whatever, but luckily he's good. Not to mention Trademarc is one of the illest slept-on cats ever. Freddie Foxxx a.k.a. Bumpy Knuckles drops his first of many guest spots on "Flow East", which is just a rugged posse cut with hard rhymes and sick production. This track itself is pure jam session material. However, "Right Now" is far superior to either. "Right Now" is John Cena's light-hearted, peace track where Cena praises the age old "stop the violence" movement, telling us that life is good and that sometimes you've got to relax and enjoy life. It's so true. The production pulls the popular "Just Blaze" style high-pitched sped-up sampling and backed by a hauntingly melodic xylophone and soft claps, you've got yerself a nice little joint to jam repeatedly.

But oh no, that's not the only classic to be found on You Can't See Me. It's obvious that John Cena really wanted a sick album to be his debut and you can tell he worked his ass off on it. Take one gander at "Just Another Day", which is Cena's analytical view of the lifestyle of professional wrestling and blending it into an absolutely addicting hip-hop joint. The internet wrestling crowd will completely understand what Cena speaks of, the casual marks will learn something, and the non-fans with open minds will be intruiged. Trademarc on the other hand goes the more traditional route, introspectively examining his poverty and will to survive until he finally gets his due. The sparkling 80's style percussion and mid-tempo feel will bob many heads. The track immediately following, "Summer Flings", is another sure-fire banger. One thing I cannot knock on this album is the absolutely rugged production, coming off with a blend of styles from 95-96 and recent underground cuts. On this track, Cena drops his voice to a low volume to drop his own version of "Summertime", only with more pimpin'. It's obvious that Cena and Trademarc can do it all, and they prove it numerous times on You Can't See Me.

Continuing with the hotness, the lead single "Bad Bad Man" is an energetic track with a very cool video (which they've been showing on WWE TV every single show). John Cena's intro to the rap world is pretty fitting production-wise; rough guitar flicks, oriental whistles, and a simple drum loop set up the fun, light-hearted feel. Cena's verse is fun and Trademarc compliments him well. However it's Bumpy Knuckles who blatantly steals the show here, with a damn-catchy hook and the best verse of the song. While "Running Game" sounds a tad bit too much like a Bubba Sparxxx track, the cut is yet another sick one, with Cena displaying his versatile flow, excellent lyrics, and memorable punchlines "Y'all got no flow, we be makin hits // You like a proctologist, you feelin my shit // Yeah - you all hype like a street team // I spend more time holdin a mic than Mean Gene". Without a doubt the most memorable rhyme of this song has to be the infamous: "She called my dick Frank White cause it's _'Notoriously BIG'_." Ha! Cena might not have the street sense of Nas, or the crafty venom of a Rakim, or the depth of a Cormega, but dammit, he can rock a mic like few and can merely entertain with his voice, a good beat, and some memorable lines. Trademarc's got a little less charisma and far-too-often reverts to "the formula", but is probably a tad bit better poetically.

It's hard to find an underground head (or even a 12 year old wanna-be backpacker) who hasn't heard of Esoteric. Well he pops up in "Beantown", which is a big-ups to their home city of Boston. All they needed to do is add Akrobatik and you'd have a completely perfect tribute, but either way, this is hot. Cena's charisma is second-to-none, and his chemistry with Trademarc should be noted (since I haven't noted it yet). Esoteric is given the grand entrance as the tracks final emcee, who rips the track up. Eso is obviously the most experienced of the three, but he knows he's in good company. "This is How We Roll" is pure G-Funk. This is Cena's obvious tribute to the early 90s west coast sound, with the thumping basslines, dangerous piano, and high-noted keys. Cena's flow is very Dre-like, calm but mean, which I like. One thing that I must stress is the fact that Cena is quite ill when it comes to punchlines, so don't sleep on the cat in that area.

"I'm fully focused, I walk with a purpose
Y'all are fuckin clowns, you belong in a circus
This is big bid'ness, we don't stop 'til the money home
Block shakin more buzz than a honeycomb"

or

"Copped your CD it sounds great on mute"... GENIUS!

The last real masterpiece on here has to be "If It All Ended Tommorow". Now, while the subject of fame crashing down has indeed been revisited by numerous emcees throughout the years, Cena's version is a tad bit different. Cena's view of himself as a double celebrity is intruiging, because he's an emcee as well as a wrestler. While his style of rap isn't exactly of the MTV formula (Cena ain't a pretty boy), and wrestling hasn't ruled the Earth since 2001, Cena doesn't have to worry much about drama just yet. Either way, I respect and admire John Cena because two of my passions in my life since childhood were wrestling and hip-hop, and Cena does them both. Am I biased to Cena? Absolutely not. Hell I thought the album would suck just because I didn't think Cena was capable of doing a good album and was too one-dimensional, and boy was I wrong. Wow, I digressed like hell. Anyways: the song is tight and an metaphoric intruiging look at Cena's mindstate. Cena is brilliant folks... don't deny it.

Now, is every song on here a certified classic? By all means no. "Make It Loud" was Cena's foray into krunk music, and you know how much I hate krunk. The song is as watered down as can get and I just-assume skip it every single time. "Keep Frontin" is nice and hardcore, but it doesn't keep my attention. Bumpy was blatantly holding back his venom, Cena was good, but not great, and the production was annoying. "Chain Gang is the Click" is just annoying as all hell and does nothing to keep me listening. Otherwise, the album is ILL, what more can I say?

To conclude, You Can't See Me is a hell of a lot better than I ever thought it could be. It becomes obvious that Cena was trying a little bit of everything on the album and for the most-part he proved he could do it all. Cena's got a sick flow (though it's off sometimes), some memorable punchlines, awesome beats, and Trademarc in his corner. Weaknesses? Well Cena takes too much time to brag and lacks two or three actual SONGS with depth and meaning. I was hoping to find out more about John's past, but perhaps he's saving those stories for his book/DVD/next album. In case anybody is interested in Cena's ring work, this Sunday on Pay-Per-View he's defending his WWE Championship in an I-Quit match against JBL at Judgment Day. Either way, make sure all hip-hop lovers cop this as soon as possible.

To those smart enough to listen: Word Life.

To those who hate: F-U.

4.25 Stars... Rounded Down to 4




SIMILAR ALBUMS:

7L and Esoteric - DC2: Bars of Death

Akrobatik - The Lost Adats

Royce Da 5'9 - Rock City

LL Cool J - Mr. Smith