Soul Fighter Mindscape for Dreamcast

Oh boy, where does one begin. Well maybe I should take this back to when I was a wee lad growing up in the rolling hills of Venenzuela. Everyday I would take my trust Goat (Pancho) to me to the local school. We would learn of a facinating world far away, and then one day, our teacher made a run for the boarder....the Venenzuelan/Russian boarder that is. The Gustapo found her and brought her back to us, but she had no desire to teach us anymore, not after seeing the promise land. So the next day we stayed at home. While attempting to make the most of my day by sleeping in, I was awoken by the sound of a man harvesting coffee. It was a young scrony lad by the name of Juan Valdez and obviously his trusty mule. I told him my tale, and he promised that if myself and Pancho follow him and his trsuty mule to the boarder (The US one this time) we could make it. So late at night, he came back to my shack, and with nothing but the clothes on my back and 127 lbs of coffee between us, we made the 3 mile pillage to the boarder. About 3 feet across the boarder INS caught us and hauled away to a local secure prison. After them beating a confession out of me that I was actually a mis guided youth from America origninally and I was only visiting Venenzuela they allowed me to stay, but Juan was caught trying to stuff the 127 lbs of coffee in balloon and swallowing them, I believe he got about 2/3 of the way done before the feds wised up, they watched him day and night until all the coffee was out of his system, then they dined like kings on the profits from the "Mountain Grown" crystals that they had sold to Maxwell House, I believe that Juan is now serving time as a slave somewhere, I wonder what happened to that once chipper fellow. The Moral of the story.....What you put into something, may not be what you recieve in the end:)

Most Video Games are like that, you justify sitting infront of a TV set and hammering your joystick for 50 hours on end to see....and ending. And usually one that is no longer than a couple minutes at best. But Soul Fighter changes that aspect, because you won't wanna put any time into it and you won't receive anything out of it, except maybe some convulsions if you are one of the lucky 2 percent....bastards! Anyway, after viewing the back label of the game and seeing its a dismle 1 player if you still decide to buy it, the first level should have you swearing up a bloody storm. This game should have been atleast 2-3 players, and with the right camera view it could have been, which would have given it some reason to play the game, but all in all, this game hardly even looks good graphically. More cartoony and that's not my bag at all.

If you dig getting physically ill while playing games, then step right up and take a ticket. NOW SERVING.....3! Because that's how many people have boughten, and consequently returned the game nationwide. Now this game did have promise, but it looks like it was thrown together in a matter of a few weeks in a rush to be out on the new list for DC titles, which we know there are few to begin with, but c'mon, people won't buy crap, hense people won't by this!

Graphics---Ok, so it doesn't look horrible, but its too cartoony. I don't know, I hate anime too, so maybe this is the reasoning behind it. Not that these guys have anime features, but the only cartoon in my book worth watching is that loveable family know as the Simpsons, but hey, if you dig road runner and such, maybe rent it for a laugh....or to extract revenge from someone you dislike or a confession from a hardened criminal who has spent 12 years in the pen and had one too many things "drop" in the shower.

Sound---Asside of the obvious sounds that should come from a fighter, there really wasn't much sound coming from this game. And when you did hear it, who cares, it wasn't there long enough to make a difference, so if you love video game music (and I know some of you do) this isn't for you, but then again, I listen to CDs while I play mostly, so what does it matter, right?

Gameplay---The ever changing camera work on this game would anger Quentin Terintino, if you can figure out how to move yourself in on dirrection for a period longer then 2.5 seconds then you are well on you way to becoming a Jedi Master....or not.

Replay Value---NONE! THROW IT AWAY! Use it as a shiney coaster, just for the children's sake, DON'T PUT THIS IN THE DREAMCAST, you might infect it with.....crapulence, and there is no cure for that, we are working hard, but we need support from people like you. So stop the spread of Crapulence, be aware, be safe!

Overall---If this game is worth anything to you, so help me god...If you can't judge yourself how bad this game is from just what I have told you so far, then go out and rent it, or go to a local videogame dealer and ask them if they will give you a copy, im sure they can find a few hundred on there selves collecting dust. They have no need for em.